Have you ever been moved by something?  Something that speaks to you, but doesn’t need words.  Something that spontaneously encourages you to grow, learn, change, try new things, to find a purpose.  Well I have and I’ve grown to call this “something” passion.  I believe that as human beings we have either found purpose because of a passion, or we are drawn to those who have.  Either we have it or we want it, but I think it’s pretty safe to say that this yearning for passion is an innate human quality.

My name is Rachel Jacobsen, born in Thousand Oaks, California and subsequently raised by Hippies in Ojai, California.  I was your typical “flower child”, a dirty, free-spirited rugrat running around Grateful Dead concerts with squirt guns in hand and a flower halo squeezed over my tangled hair.  Youngest daughter of three girls to very young parents, with a father who didn’t know how to be one (having not grown up with one himself), and an alcoholic mother who fought the pressures of raising three very young children on her own.  Not being one to beat around the bush, this is the most poignant way of describing why I’ve grown up to be extremely self-sufficient, ambitious, impatient and obsessively controlling of my surroundings.  Yet in spite of the way I’ve turned out, life has always found a way to challenging the definitions for which I’ve come to identify myself…

Why would someone want to read about my life experiences?  I don’t have a wall full of credentials, haven’t saved a third world country from starvation, and haven’t gone from rags to riches.  Fact is I’m still a life standing on the precipice of uncertain outcome.  Yet for some reason I’m drawn, compelled, and moved by “something” to share and unveil my world.  How then do I go about bridging the gap between sharing my perspectives on life, as I am going through it at the same time?  I don’t know how to properly navigate this territory, but I maintain solace in the fact that it’s been done before.

I guess you could say that this project is me paying it forward.  I am driven to those who have passion, whether they are passionately moved by knitting or passionately moved by leather shoes.  There’s something extremely vulnerable about being let into others passionate endeavors and I find it a privilege to be let into that space.  I struggle to give a justified definition for how I see passion in others, perhaps after a few blog entries we can start to get a better glimpse into that part of my world.  I’m passionate about connecting with people, whether it be through their passions, or through mine.  I love the moment when judgment disintegrates and exploration begins, if even for a few moments in time.  That common creative space between two, or more, people is like looking directly into the portal between thought and manifestation.  The connection of people navigating through life with different experiences and perspectives coming together for a moment of unfiltered connection, a sort of unspoken appreciation and understanding of our differences and how fucking cool that really is!

I’m just another person navigating through this strange universe within the rules that the human species has created and we as individuals spend our whole lives trying to break free from.  Maybe I’m naive, misled, undereducated, or funny, confrontational, crazy, and curious.  I’m not trying to be the most enlightened blogger the internet has ever encountered, fact is I’ve found solace in flaws, I’ve found my unique way of looking at life in the deep dark crevices of my being, I laugh where others might not, I’ll dance, cry, curse and yell.  I actively work on jarring loose the adhesions of life and the scars that have built up over time on this long strange trip that has been my life.  I’m not trying to glamorize my struggles and the hurdles I’ve had to overcome, but I would be lying if I said that they didn’t have direct influence on my growth and drive to be a better person, so they will be talked about, analyzed, picked apart and reintegrated in ways that help me grow as an individual.

This may not cover everything I feel is important for you to know going into the massive complex net of my being, but it’s a good damn start, so here we go…

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